


Duck Fuck

by MsPeggyElliott



Series: The Duck Fuck Chronicles [1]
Category: Original Work, comics - Fandom, retail - Fandom
Genre: Comics, Gender transformation, Genderfluid, Nonsense, Other, Real Life, Retail, Suicide, personal, self-deprecation
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-12
Updated: 2019-12-12
Packaged: 2021-02-26 04:01:28
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,332
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21767269
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MsPeggyElliott/pseuds/MsPeggyElliott
Summary: Just a couple of guys hanging out at the job and talking about life. This has nothing to do with ducks.
Series: The Duck Fuck Chronicles [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1568779
Kudos: 2





	Duck Fuck

**Author's Note:**

> I've decided to write down my life in a bizarre and surreal way. The title is a silly in-joke.

I find it so tiring to get up in the morning I'm so much more active in the night time, all I want to do is clean my room, work on my stories and maybe catch up on my reading. I'd be lying if I saw I didn't miss college, I'm still a snobby film student at heart...maybe I'll go back to that.

"Getting ready to open up." Says the man knocking me out of my head.

"Yep, just let me get the lights on." I unlock the door, but make sure to lock it behind me so they don't follow me in. Don't get me wrong, I like this place, but I know it very well and know I need to cover myself. After getting all the lights on I head back to unlock the door and the person is gone.

I listen to a lot of 90's alternative at work I grew up in that era, but when I was growing up I listened to a lot music from the 60's mostly the Beatles. There is a station for The Beatles, but I can listen to them any fucking time I want.

The boss leaves me nothing to do, which is fine my other job leaves me so burnt out I typically don't mind the lack of tasks. I should probably tell you by now that I work part time in a comic shop mostly on the weekends. It's usually dead, but sometimes you get some interesting things.

Not long after opening I get....someone....theirs something in his eyes this one I can't put my finger on it but he scares me a bit it might be the rolling suitcase...I never trust those people. He drops the suitcase and immediately sheds his mortal coil and reveals himself to me in his true form as "The Demon". The Demon is aggressive, but harmless he prances throughout the store, for sustenance he feasts upon the blood of the dead infants he carries with him. Concerned for those who might be in the vicinity I ask the Demon if he needs help. The Demon responds in tongues and it's in his eyes I see the place, my final place the last place I shall ever visit when come the end of my time and I fuck right off. He ends his ritual and leaves before the next person shows up.

Late in the afternoon, Yohan shows up to relieve me of my post. Yohan is a wonderful young college man the boss man hired not too long ago. Kid's a champ and will definitely go far. My shift is over, but I have nothing to do so I just hang out on the couch. I could probably go home, catch up on some reading, play some games or write some stuff, but fuck it.

Not too long after my shift ends another interesting cat shows up, let's call him "The Pervert". For the longest time our store had an adult section, it was small and the selection was...meh. The Pervert would come in and browse that small section. The pervert always gave off this weird vibe he looked like a aging Jerry Lewis with weird eyes and a disgusting bulging cock.

"Ugh, who reads this filth." He would say stroking his cock. "Uuuuuhhhhh this is so disgusting." he moaned as he came all over books on the bottom shelf. Part of me wanted to handle it, but I was off the clock. As I was thinking it though, Yohan was already on it.

"Sir, I'm going to ask you to stop cumming on all our books." He said in his manly voice.

The Pervert goes into Yohan close and asks, "Do you do discounts on these books!" Yohan, that brave young lad, stood there and listened to the Pervert as he went on about nonsense his stench fouled the place and his breath was worse. The Pervert started to lose control as he typically did his cock would harden and he would swing about the place, knocking all the shelves over. I went to assist Yohan, but that boy had it handled. Yohan gripped The Perverts cock and snapped it off at the base. Acting fast before The Pervert could grow another one, Yohan stabs him through the chest. I assist Yohan in disposing the body. 

"How long do you think he'll stay dead, Duck?" Asks Yohan as he heaves the body wrapped in tarp into the dumpster.

"Not for long, but he never comes back to the store right away." I say. 

Back at the store, I sit right back on the couch.

"No offense, but don't you have anything better to do?" Asks Yohan.

I ignore the question.

"How's school going?" I say getting ready to fall asleep.

"Are you drunk?"

"I had a few on the way back from the dumpster. I saw The Demon again."

Yohan started to tune out.

"The Demon looked directly at me this time, I'm finding it hard to live right now..."

"Just so you know, I'm always available...."

"Yeah, I'm going to head on home. Have a good weekend."

The drive is very distracting part way through my vision gets very blurry and it's hard to see. I miss the light turning red and I get T-boned in the intersection. My legs and throat hurt as I get out of my car, the person in the other car asks me something, but I can't hear anything. I try to say something too, but it hurts it appears some shrapnel has lodged itself into my throat. The paramedics arrive as I'm walking away, they try and stop me, but I shake them off....they ain't so tough.

The walk home is a pain the neck (get it), I get stopped by a gang of goblins. I really hate goblins they steal your money and shit down your shirt. Their normally no match for me, but I was just hurt in a car wreck so they over take me easily....and they shit down my shirt. I finally make it home and the pain from the wreck has caught up with me I collapse on the floor and nearly bleed out, but I have just enough strength to crawl to my room and climb into bed. Passing out does nothing for me as the pain gets worse I finally decide it's time to end this and blow my brains out with the pistol next to my bed.

Next thing I know I'm in the hellish pits I saw earlier this morning. Satan is waiting, but is surprised to see me confused he looks at his clipboard.

"Hey Duck, I hate to say it, but it's not your time....again. This is the fourth time you've been here and yet you're not expected here for another...." he flips through the pages on his clipboard. "65-70 years."

"You don't have an exact date, Satan?"

"Oh I could get an exact date, but I'm busy. There's more important things going on than just you."

"Yeah, I hear you."

"No get out and try to take care of yourself, Duck. I don't want to see you in here until it's time."

I awake in my room free of pain, but my body feels slightly off. I realize quickly that while I was out my body had changed gender. My body did that from time to time, sometimes my body will be male and other times it's female. Bonus is my size stays the same so I still wear my dude clothes. I always made sure to call ahead at both my jobs to let them know I was coming to work female. They were all pretty cool about it, but I always felt annoyed because they felt less jokey around me when I was female.

Anyways...where was I? Oh yeah...so I can't really die or else Satan will get mad and send me back.


End file.
